Faithful readers here will know that I (Orin) have been involved with a summer camp called Youth Sing Praise for many years – 20 to be precise.
Sacraments are a portion of the prayer life of the week, as you’d expect from a Catholic program: mass twice and an opportunity for reconciliation as well. Well, “way back in the day,” and without pointing fingers at anyone in particular, the reconciliation service had sort-of devolved into— into, well, something. Campers would sometimes come to the service excited solely because it would be an opportunity to cry, and to cry hard. (There were other curious things “wrong” with the service, but this isn’t the time or place for those details.)
Anyway. This experience of encountering Christ and the graces bestowed in the sacrament had given way to something much more human and, in most cases, quite far from the ideal. That’s not to say that for some people it was an encounter with God’s boundless love lead them to holy tears, I’m sure that happened for some. For others, though, I’m quite certain the experience became merely a reason to let go of emotions in perhaps an unnecessary and unhealthy way.
Then there were always a couple youth each year who worried that their experience of the sacrament was incomplete. “But, I didn’t cry—” became a familiar complaint: both from those who really wanted to but for some reason didn’t, and from those who were not moved by God’s presence to do so. I have heard similar reactions from those who experience group adoration for the first time, especially in certain circumstances where many react to that presence of the Lord in emotional and profound ways.
Knowing what to do when in the presence of the Lord, be it sacramentally or otherwise, can be challenging – especially if it’s our first time with a profound awareness of that presence. Further, knowing that we are in the presence of the Lord can sometimes be even more of a challenge.
Ignatian spirituality invites us to “see God in everything.” That’s not necessarily a good place to start for those who have some difficulty knowing God’s presence; it is, though, a reality that is amazing when we can finally come to it. Will the presence of the Lord, all around us change us? How can we know it’s Jesus, for sure? What if it is but we don’t recognize him? Will we be changed then?
To circle back: after a few years of this “devolved” reconciliation service, we had to “rip the bandaid off” so to speak and start again. A new time, a new location, a new way to encounter the Lord. There were many not happy about that, and some that were. Having trouble recognizing the Lord around you? It’s unpleasant for a moment, but: is there some bandaid you need to rip off of your spirituality, for a fresh start? Perhaps you are unaware of it, but a friend or relative might be. How can you, and we all, be more aware of the presence of the Lord, right now, today?